Today has been a fiasco . Everything was going great guns at the bon voyage party last night. Good DJ (even though big Steve paid him a lot to keep playing his band The Rotten Hill Gang). Drinks were called Femme Fatale because they brought out the bitch in you .
I was sat in the corner minding my own and getting bladdered on my secret stash of JD. Suddenly Big Steve who by then had, had more than a sniff of the barmaids appron approaches me with what can only be described as an aggressive gate .
He snatched my strings and made me dance , the worse thing about it was he made me dance like he dances . Now those of you who know how he dances will be able to share in the pain and shame that i went through on the dance floor. Unlike the Arctic Monkeys we did not look good on the dance floor .
However things started to look up when a pair of twins joined us and started bumping and grinding . I thought my number was up . Either that or I was seeing double due to the excessive over pour of JD I had just given myself .
It was about then that things deteriorated . twins grinding !! i couldn't help my self i got a little excited . who wouldn't ? well apparently my bandages were a bit loose and i exposed myself ....
He dropped my strings in a flash but the damage was done . i was bagged thrown in the trunk and that's where i have been all day .
No breakfast no lunch and now we are in a town named after a grocery store:
Craig (or was that Ralph)
We are at the Elk Motel . It has a hunting and fishing theme and with the exception of Sarah Palin this sort of thing is of no interest to women . so tonight Josephine its just me and the boys .
MESSAGE FROM STEPHEN AND JEFF
as you have read the puppet is out of order and had to be punished so we are going to fill you in on the day .
we left a rainy Boulder after a big mountain breakfast to help with the big mountain headache at about 11 . 30 .
one thing became obvious immediately . That was all money Jeff had spent on the car since the last trip . It is now a muscle car with its new 428 cu inch V 8 . This thing is now like the beast from Death Proof . it growls and roars and frightens small children . I have that effect on small children also . you ask my girls .
Jeff and i may look a bit broke back mountain but there is not one Gay nut in this testosterone seeping machine .
with the new found power we headed for the hills
Colorado may be a lot of things but small and confined it ain't . the scenery is expansive and spectacular . mountains .,rivers ,glaciers . miles and miles of it . Beautiful .
we are holing up in the vast metropolis of Craig Co. and about to hit the only bar . the guy on the front desk assured us that not only the Italian but also the Mexican and the Chinese and the grill are all good . well really i wonder what AA Gill would have to say about that
Blog off
Stephen and Jeff
SOUNDTRACK OF THE DAY
David Bowie , Nirvana , Groove armada , New Order , Rotten hill Gang , Jeff Buckley , Santana Jane's, Addiction , Dirty Pretty Things , The Orb , Johnny Cash , The Who ,Nina Simone and Faithless
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1 comment:
So you are blasting down the highway with the ghost of Hunter in your trunk waiting for the bats and nitrous at every bend. I suggest you pull into the next music emporium and purchase Ike Reilly's "Racists and Salesmen" and put it on the CD player on LOUD. A sasauge boy band that will speak to your souls...the first line is life affriming! And yes the puppet will love it too... Cynthia a friend of Karen's ask Jeff
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